poisonedgrace: (Default)

Last night, I dreamed that I was in that weird grocery store that I have in my dreams sometimes.  This time, I was near the middle, with some family members.  Someone had a Pomeranian, and it was milling about in a wading pool.  Some of the rest of us were near there, having sword fights with these sticks, made for that purpose.  Some friend of my sister's, from long ago was mentioned by name, and the name was familiar to me, but I kept having all these different ideas who it was supposed to be, none of which were correct.  Of course, since she was mentioned, and it confused me, she then showed up (this was not any real person, but a creation of the dream).  Everyone kept telling stories of her being around in the past, and things that happened, even times when I was there, and this was supposed to be a person I was long term familiar with, but for whatever reason, I had no memory of her at all.  Everyone said that she had a much different appearance now anyhow.

We all got in a car and drove around looking at these massive and brilliant Halloween displays.  Whole yards and even neighborhood blocks done up in the grandest ways.  I was in the car beside this person, and we got along really well, even though I had no memory of her.  Her look kept changing, and she had tattoos, constantly shifting over her.  At times she had the tattoos of everyone I have ever known, sort of languidly rolling across her, different from one look to the next.  She suggested that we go to her old house, and everyone agreed.

We drove there, and it was a trailer, with a lot of porches and outbuildings, and she said that she had not been there in years but her family still lived there.  They were not home, so she got the spare key and went in.  There was a ton of Halloween stuff here too, and we were looking through it all, and I remember at one point, she was wearing a sort of open front brown robe, and I watch the tattoos shift and change and she had several different people's at the same time, even.  I liked her, and felt very familiar with her, even though I also felt like it was a first meeting.  There was more to all this
, but I can't remember.

Side note, I am not convinced that she wasn't One Of Them, but I was not sure enough to quantify the dream as such.

I don't remember any other dreams, either.
___

Limbo at least arrests the fall, even if briefly.
But that might not be a good thing, over all.

poisonedgrace: (Default)
 
Last night I had this sprawling sort of dream that was like some march through sections of everyone that I have ever known sort of flashing by.  Like walking through a maze populated by... everyone or something.  I remember a few random instances of specifics, but most of it is vague, such as visiting people's homes, people visiting my homes, people meeting at the homes of others, or reunion type settings. I specifically remember being in a room with a group of people as waves if enemies entered.  All sorts of vile undead creatures and stuff, and we had weapons and tools and had to halt their progress.  I had done this a million times, and talked everyone through it.

I remember later, being at a sort of a mall or something near a river, and tons of people I have known were all over, waiting in lines and talking.  I was with a blond woman who had patched of metallic gold skin with rough texture.  She had a splash of it right across the middle of her face, and it could be blinding in the sun.  She didn't want to walk anymore, so I carried her, we were going somewhere specific, and could not be separated. 


There was a lot more to it, but I woke up.

Yesterday was more of the same.  I reach out into my life, and run my hands across the strings and I feel the trembling fragility of... everything.  Frail and shatterable, slowly decaying, even that has a certain kind of beauty.


Also, my folks are headed back to Canada on Friday. 




poisonedgrace: (the sigil)
Ageless and endless
I cry unto you
Darkness within the Ground

Shapeless and eternal
I shout for you
Darkness within the Sky

Bottomless and unseen
I call you out
Darkness within the Sea

Bound in stone
Burned by fire
Bathed in blood

Three times three times three
As it is above
So below shall it be
poisonedgrace: (the sigil)
To: A Girl in a Parking Lot Whom I Do Not Know

I was walking behind you today
Downwind & falling behind
You were Going Somewhere
Walking swiftly
Someplace To Be
But me?
I was going nowhere
Just out for a stroll
Idle and thoughtful
Tasting the wind and leaves

I could smell you
You smelled like New
Like a clothing store
Like a hundred rich cotton things
Lycra, Suede, and Polyester in every shade
You smelled like New Shoes
Never worn before your brisk walk
It made me wonder

What would I smell like
If someone were walking
even more leisurely than I
Downwind & falling behind
I wonder if they would notice

The coppery sanguine scent of old scars
Books left in dark corners slowly growing aware
Unspun yarn, heaped about the spinner's wheel
Milk and bread left as offering at the mound
All the secrets of the swamp wrapped into
my dark and tattered old clothes
poisonedgrace: (lucy)

Beautiful day out yesterday, giving way to a wonderous pre-dawn sky.  In-between those was cram packed with dreams.  The last two nights at least have been.  Filled with beauty and longing.  At least in my eyes.  I'm sure some of them are things that other people might consider 'nightmares'.  I don't have enough to give whole stories.  I mostly have feelings and a few scenes.

Night before last was a maze of pools and walks.  Gardens and rocks.  It was beautiful and there was blue and green water.  Roaming animals, lovely weather and wonder.  I know some of you were there, and there was a certain... 'presence' associated with the whole thing.  There was a girl whom I feel like I should know.  Like... I can't correctly explain this, but I know what I know her, only I don't know who she is.  Or was.  Or will be?  She was very comforting and ...important?  I wish I could say more about it, but it's mostly feelings and weird fleeting images.

Last night I was at a place like a school I guess.  There were a lot of people going to and fro on various Matters Of Importance.  I was surrounded by people, some of whom I may or may not know in real life.  Or maybe knew once a long time ago.  The girl from the night before was there again.  I guess she's in my dreams from time to time.  I really wish I knew who she is.  She was with me last night for longer than the night before.  I had been standing with some friends and she came along and never said much.  She was always very close to me and it just felt... right, I guess.  There are a lot of possibilities I suppose.  Maybe she'll come back soon and tell me more.  Or maybe I know when I'm in that world, and then come to this one where I'm not allowed to know.  Maybe it's Her, and maybe it's not.  Heck, maybe in that world, I write about this one, struggling to remember all of you and how I spend my time here.  I wonder if there, I long to be here, or if that one is truly better...

At the end of the (school?) day, some friends were 'walking me home'.  Home was a grave out in a field.  My body would go down in there, and then my spirit would leave it and go along with my friends somewhere else.  In the morning, I would re-animate my dead body and go back to (I still assume) school.  I had been "dead" for a while, and even though this was secret, it had become a 'normal every day' thing.  We made it to my grave and were attending the task at hand.

Suddenly, some sort of "Witch Hunter" person appeared behind us and caught us in the act.  She was this super freaky, almost awesomely deformed sorta looking blonde girl.  I can't really describe her to well, but the proportions and angles of her face were just all so... off...  Maybe she wasn't human.  She had these really weird eyes too, but she was wearing coloured contacts to hide something about them.  She had a group of followers who were also weird and sort of non-human, but I am unable to describe them enough to bother with.

She started to question us, and then she was going to dispose of me.  She had some ritual or something to trap me inside my dead body.  She filled the grave with what felt like rubbing alcohol at the time, but now I guess maybe it was holy water or something.  I was stuck under it and writhing to escape.  Finally I managed to slip out of my body.  I was going to escape somewhere, and just let her destroy the body, because I was pretty sure I could just get into a different one later.

She could still see me though, and she trapped me in a sort of alcove and was going to finish me off.  I started talking to her and sort of talked her down into a discussion.  I was convincing her that I wasn't evil and that I had a right to "live" (I'm not sure that's the right word, but I don't know one for this situation) just like anyone else.

I woke up during the discussion.

Sprinkled in amongst these were many others that I retained less of.  I know in one there was something I had to stab.  I woke myself up stabbing it :/

I really wish I could be more descriptive somehow, but it just wouldn't even make sense to try to describe some of the things.  For instance, all I can really think to say about the girl, aside what I have said, is that she is "somehow represented by a short black verticle line or stripe" and that makes absolutely no sense when describing a person.  Not to mention that she is represented by that shape 'emotionally' and not visually.  Yeah, it doesn't really even make sense to me either :P

poisonedgrace: (lucy)

Beautiful day out yesterday, giving way to a wonderous pre-dawn sky.  In-between those was cram packed with dreams.  The last two nights at least have been.  Filled with beauty and longing.  At least in my eyes.  I'm sure some of them are things that other people might consider 'nightmares'.  I don't have enough to give whole stories.  I mostly have feelings and a few scenes.

Night before last was a maze of pools and walks.  Gardens and rocks.  It was beautiful and there was blue and green water.  Roaming animals, lovely weather and wonder.  I know some of you were there, and there was a certain... 'presence' associated with the whole thing.  There was a girl whom I feel like I should know.  Like... I can't correctly explain this, but I know what I know her, only I don't know who she is.  Or was.  Or will be?  She was very comforting and ...important?  I wish I could say more about it, but it's mostly feelings and weird fleeting images.

Last night I was at a place like a school I guess.  There were a lot of people going to and fro on various Matters Of Importance.  I was surrounded by people, some of whom I may or may not know in real life.  Or maybe knew once a long time ago.  The girl from the night before was there again.  I guess she's in my dreams from time to time.  I really wish I knew who she is.  She was with me last night for longer than the night before.  I had been standing with some friends and she came along and never said much.  She was always very close to me and it just felt... right, I guess.  There are a lot of possibilities I suppose.  Maybe she'll come back soon and tell me more.  Or maybe I know when I'm in that world, and then come to this one where I'm not allowed to know.  Maybe it's Her, and maybe it's not.  Heck, maybe in that world, I write about this one, struggling to remember all of you and how I spend my time here.  I wonder if there, I long to be here, or if that one is truly better...

At the end of the (school?) day, some friends were 'walking me home'.  Home was a grave out in a field.  My body would go down in there, and then my spirit would leave it and go along with my friends somewhere else.  In the morning, I would re-animate my dead body and go back to (I still assume) school.  I had been "dead" for a while, and even though this was secret, it had become a 'normal every day' thing.  We made it to my grave and were attending the task at hand.

Suddenly, some sort of "Witch Hunter" person appeared behind us and caught us in the act.  She was this super freaky, almost awesomely deformed sorta looking blonde girl.  I can't really describe her to well, but the proportions and angles of her face were just all so... off...  Maybe she wasn't human.  She had these really weird eyes too, but she was wearing coloured contacts to hide something about them.  She had a group of followers who were also weird and sort of non-human, but I am unable to describe them enough to bother with.

She started to question us, and then she was going to dispose of me.  She had some ritual or something to trap me inside my dead body.  She filled the grave with what felt like rubbing alcohol at the time, but now I guess maybe it was holy water or something.  I was stuck under it and writhing to escape.  Finally I managed to slip out of my body.  I was going to escape somewhere, and just let her destroy the body, because I was pretty sure I could just get into a different one later.

She could still see me though, and she trapped me in a sort of alcove and was going to finish me off.  I started talking to her and sort of talked her down into a discussion.  I was convincing her that I wasn't evil and that I had a right to "live" (I'm not sure that's the right word, but I don't know one for this situation) just like anyone else.

I woke up during the discussion.

Sprinkled in amongst these were many others that I retained less of.  I know in one there was something I had to stab.  I woke myself up stabbing it :/

I really wish I could be more descriptive somehow, but it just wouldn't even make sense to try to describe some of the things.  For instance, all I can really think to say about the girl, aside what I have said, is that she is "somehow represented by a short black verticle line or stripe" and that makes absolutely no sense when describing a person.  Not to mention that she is represented by that shape 'emotionally' and not visually.  Yeah, it doesn't really even make sense to me either :P

poisonedgrace: (wild things)
This is why my sister kicks your ass:





I am so proud of her & Eric that I could practically explode.  Doing what you have to do and going out to live your dream is the best, most magical and inspiring thing that any person can ever hope to do.

I'm so glad they did it, and didn't let all the stupid naysayers ruin anything for them.

I had forgotten how much I love that song she used as well.
It'll be struck in my head all day.

So, at some point when I go visit them in the future, who wants to come with?
:D
___

Dreamed last night that I met up with an internet acquaintance (I'm not sure if it was a real person, or someone unique to the dream.  Or perhaps, I've been tricked by another Guise and I don't fully realize it yet.  The nature of the Lesson supports that).  We were in a weird neighbourhood that was somehow familiar and yet very strange.  The fattest man I've ever seen was there.  He was also some sort of... primative beast.

My new dream friend gave me a bracelet.  When she wore it, every part was a brilliant shining colour.  She tied it on my wrist, and all the colour fled.  It was the most drab neutral gray/brown you can imagine.  She told me "The colours will come with time.  As you wear it and live your life,  it will fill in and eventually become bright."

There was more but I've lost it.
___

I have some things I've learned and observations I've made.
More forgiveness for cats and more clarity on my understanding of the past.


poisonedgrace: (wild things)
This is why my sister kicks your ass:





I am so proud of her & Eric that I could practically explode.  Doing what you have to do and going out to live your dream is the best, most magical and inspiring thing that any person can ever hope to do.

I'm so glad they did it, and didn't let all the stupid naysayers ruin anything for them.

I had forgotten how much I love that song she used as well.
It'll be struck in my head all day.

So, at some point when I go visit them in the future, who wants to come with?
:D
___

Dreamed last night that I met up with an internet acquaintance (I'm not sure if it was a real person, or someone unique to the dream.  Or perhaps, I've been tricked by another Guise and I don't fully realize it yet.  The nature of the Lesson supports that).  We were in a weird neighbourhood that was somehow familiar and yet very strange.  The fattest man I've ever seen was there.  He was also some sort of... primative beast.

My new dream friend gave me a bracelet.  When she wore it, every part was a brilliant shining colour.  She tied it on my wrist, and all the colour fled.  It was the most drab neutral gray/brown you can imagine.  She told me "The colours will come with time.  As you wear it and live your life,  it will fill in and eventually become bright."

There was more but I've lost it.
___

I have some things I've learned and observations I've made.
More forgiveness for cats and more clarity on my understanding of the past.


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