poisonedgrace: (Default)
here we go again:


the ONLY difference between a "panda" and a leprechaun is that my people haven't spent billions trying to convince the world that leprechauns actually exist.

evolution would never have made a panda.
they can't exist.
they can't breed.
they can't eat.
they can't fend for themselves.
they're worse than some of the other man-made breeds 

you know, those pug face cats who have tear ducts that constantly leak because their natural order has been fucked up through the selective breeding that made them?

and srsly, chihuahuas, anyone? PUH-LEEZE! there's an actual wild predator of the fucking wastes, there.

these are all phony man-made animals.

Pandas are the worst.
I'm worried that if we ever REALLY uncover the truth about them, we'll find a bunch of shapstick genetic engineering, fleshed out with dyed bears and dogs, monkeys in terrible costumes, and ROBOTS!

If every buffoon out there didn't actually believe the lies about pandas, thus thinking they are actually real, then it wouldn't be a bazillion dollar industry.

that's right.
I am anti-panda!
I oppose the Panda Industry.

there's not a whole lot that makes me madder than pandas.
on one hand, I hate to see the majority of the world being fooled by something so see-through.
and on the other hand...

hot damn! I wish I had thought of pandas! I'd be rich!

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